Saturday, December 25, 2010

Permissive Parenting

I know I'm not the perfect parent. Certainly am not. But I think I have more experience than the average Joe when it comes to Toddlers. I mean I ran a classroom with 8 of them. So today we went to a Christmas get-together and one of the couples there have a 2 year old son and a 7 week old baby.

The mom was all cheery and happily cuddled with her baby while the dad was totally frantic and spent time admonishing his son from across the room.

Okay...here's the deal. If you go to someone else's house, be prepared to bring stuff to entertain and distract your toddler from the breakables. The dad's excuse was that the son would be interested in the other stuff so there was no point. My thoughts: then have a box/bag of special stuff to be taken only to another person's house or other place where a child needs to be entertained for a while. Why special stuff? Well, they only get to play with it every once in a while and it's not part of their everyday (hopefully being rotated) toys at home. Children show a strong interest in things they haven't seen in a while and therefore will be easier to distract away from other people's things.

Secondly, if you're child starts getting into stuff, then it's your job as the parent to redirect them. It's also your job to supervise them especially at some else's house that isn't baby proofed. He wasn't doing any of that.

Thirdly, if you child indicates that he wants to go outside. Take him outside for a little bit. Leaving him cooped up in a house for a couple of hours where he can't touch anything or play with anything is no fun. At least outside he can explore. They only went outside once to look at the lights. When he wanted to go out earlier after dinner, they prevented him from doing so.

Fourthly, if you child isn't listening to you, get down at their level and speak to them. Saying "no" and "let's not terrorize these people's stuff" from across the room is not cool.

Fifthly, if you see that your husband is about to have a melt down, then switch children. Give the new born to the husband and cuddle up with the son. She's 7 weeks post-partem; she's able to start pitching in.

And finally, if these simple things had been done and even if it was only a few of the key ones, a glass and a candy dish wouldn't have ended up broken. But as I said, I'm not the perfect parent and he's not my child.

Any who...check out the poll box to the right and vote on what you would like to see me discuss in the future.

1 comment:

  1. :-( Poor glass and candy dish (not to mention everyone else involved). I agree w/ you here except I can say from experience that the special toys idea does not work for every child. Doesn't matter if its not an every day toy, if we bring it Kalila won't touch it while we're out. 2 years worth of trying variations of that (diff toys, new toys, books, etc) and not one time did it work with her. But... she's never once broken anything while we're out either. Not sure if its because of how much we do or pure luck... because there are times we've prob fit into the scenario you painted just from both being overwelmed and not coping well at the moment.

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