Wednesday, February 11, 2015

Discipline and Disabilities Part 1

Back in December, as we were leaving our teacher, parent, pediatrician meeting, the special education teacher (who actually has a different title name) mentioned in passing that her son has an auditory disability.  She said she and her husband didn't realize it at first.  She thought her son was just "being bad."

It doesn't help that in the grand scheme of mommy wars, there's prevalence to look at less than stellar children and blame them or their parents.  Here's one example that made me cringe: 

The critics have a point.  Spanking is old fashioned and Biblical.  Every one now knows these days that the way to deal with misbehaving kids is to drug them, sentence them to endless counseling or to convince the kids that they are perfect snowflakes and that if anyone finds a problem with their behavior, well then that person must be mistaken or evil, because perfect snowflakes never do anything wrong.  What was the Pope thinking? - See more at: http://the-american-catholic.com/2015/02/09/popewatch-spare-the-rod/#sthash.2VC8EnUP.dpuf
"The critics have a point.  Spanking is old fashioned and Biblical.  Every one knows these days that the way to deal with misbehaving children is to drug them, send them to endless counseling or to convince the kids that they are perfect snowflakes...."

As a parent with of a child with perhaps mild form of autism, I was floored.  He's going to have to be sent to endless counseling and therapy because he lacks the ability to control his impulses.  If it turns out he has ADHD, then he will most likely be put on drugs.  The author seems to think the best solution would be to ignore what his teachers and pediatrician thinks and those of future therapists and instead spank him.  Because really his lack of impulse control isn't really autism, it's because his parents don't swat him on the butt when he gets out of hand.

I want to cry.  It's seriously that disturbing to me.

Remember that girl who video taped her father whipping her.  Her father was a Texas judge and stated he did not regret the spanking at all.  His reason was she disobeyed him by using the internet.  Well you may not know this but Hilary Adams, who is an adult now, was born with ataxic cerebral palsy.  That's right.  Her father knowingly hit a girl who has a physical disability and possibly given her pathology also a learning disability.  Doesn't that disturb you?  We don't hit people in wheel chairs or crutches so why is a child in the same position acceptable?

I read a number of testimonies of parents who used spanking as their go to disciplinary tool later to turn away from it with deep regret.  They found out that their "snowflake" had a disability.  Because believe it or not spanking doesn't beat the devil out of children nor does it make a cognitive, social, or physical disability go away. I could whip HB til he was black and blue, but it wouldn't help him.  Instead it would make things worse.

It deeply bothers me to hear parents talk about swatting their children's behind and calling them nicknames like Lazy Daisy because their child struggles to get ready in the morning.  Perhaps the child is autistic and clothes are overwhelming.  Perhaps Daisy suffers from a mild form of narcolepsy.  Shouldn't a parent take their child to a medical professional first to eliminate possible problems instead of automatically coming to the conclusion that name calling and butt swatting is best? 

This isn't to say we should treat children like "snowflakes", but I'll save that discussion for another day.  For now I think we should all be upset that a Catholic website would treat those with disabilities with such disdain.
The critics have a point.  Spanking is old fashioned and Biblical.  Every one now knows these days that the way to deal with misbehaving kids is to drug them, sentence them to endless counseling or to convince the kids that they are perfect snowflakes and that if anyone finds a problem with their behavior, well then that person must be mistaken or evil, because perfect snowflakes never do anything wrong.  What was the Pope thinking? - See more at: http://the-american-catholic.com/2015/02/09/popewatch-spare-the-rod/#sthash.2VC8EnUP.dpuf

The critics have a point.  Spanking is old fashioned and Biblical.  Every one now knows these days that the way to deal with misbehaving kids is to drug them, sentence them to endless counseling or to convince the kids that they are perfect snowflakes and that if anyone finds a problem with their behavior, well then that person must be mistaken or evil, because perfect snowflakes never do anything wrong.  What was the Pope thinking? - See more at: http://the-american-catholic.com/2015/02/09/popewatch-spare-the-rod/#sthash.2VC8EnUP.dpuf

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